Life and Career Coaching

Letting Go of Judgment

A simple path to inner peace

Each day we are faced with the challenge of making “good” decisions and doing the “right thing.” But who is in charge of deciding what’s good and right? Aside from basics like, “thou shall not kill” or, “treat others the way you want to be treated,” there are a lot of rules and guidelines that are imposed upon us at a young age and from the world at large. People often reference these beliefs to evaluate others and even themselves.

In my coaching practice, I often help individuals untangle themselves from judgment and emotions like shame, guilt, anger, resentment and fear that accompany being judged (by outsiders or self-imposed).

Judgment and criticism are from the same family. Judging is a form of comparison. It’s sometimes used to compare ourselves to others. It can be easy to judge and criticize in order to validate our opinion as right, and the other person as wrong. However, when comparing yourself to others, it’s easy to conclude that you are better than the other person or they are better than you because no two people are the same.

But how can one let go of judging?

  1. Be aware of when you are doing it
  2. Don’t judge yourself for judging (we all do it) but be curious and ask yourself questions like:
    • “Why am I judging?”
    • “What might the other person be going through?”
    • “How can I put myself in their shoes to understand their point of view?”
    • “What can I appreciate about this person?”
    • “How can I help?”
    • “What might this person need?”
  3. Remind ourselves that judging steals our good energy and takes away from living a nourishing life that is harmonious and aligned with the truth of who we are

Letting go of judgment is a radical act of self-love.

Imagine feeling wholeness, balance and serenity instead of anger, frustration, chaos and division. And discovering a vibrant intimacy in place of the isolating distance experienced from the act of judgment.

This may feel like a lot to unpack. But with a commitment to less judgment and more acceptance, you will find you’re able to thrive and operate from a higher frequency than ever before. “When we operate from a higher frequency, we feel happier and attract more of the good stuff.”

We are all doing this work, myself included.  It is not easy. Even for an ICF-certified life coach like me. The most important thing is to give yourself the space to try things out, to explore your feelings and to seek out healthy ways to maintain your peace.

I hope you find this food for thought a nice starting point to living a life filled with positive change, nurturing growth, increased confidence and transformative reinvention as you navigate the human experience.

Be safe. Be well. Be you.